You heard wrong: I didn’t kidnap Sita.
I didn’t even want to meet her
‘Cos I’d heard she was a cow.
But then I saw her and – wow!
She was a bit of alright!
Okay, so maybe
That dude Valmiki
Heard it differently –
You know how these things get twisted.
Is it my fault that Ram, limp-wristed,
Didn’t give her any of what she insisted
On with me? It wasn’t her intention, poor girl,
To have a vile paparazzi scribe unfurl
Her private affair on the bed of history
(Although some may call it mythology,
but not at all in the way I mean).
It’s none of their business; it would seem
To me: It was my life my love and my mistake
To give her more than she would take.
Could take. Should take.
All she wanted in the end,
Was clean air and a dirty weekend.
A bird in the hand is already a handful.